Reading The
Signs: Common Relationship Mistakes
How to spark romance staff
No matter how you slice it,
the break up of any relationship almost always leaves at
least one person asking, “How did this happen?”
The people who ask this question are the ones who fail to
recognize the warning signs that point to a relationship in
jeopardy. The reasons for which can range from being too
involved in the relationship to being too detached.
As they say, hindsight is always 20/20 vision. The insight
and wisdom you’ve gained, unfortunately, came in too late to
do something about saving the relationship.
But that doesn’t have to be necessarily so, IF you are able
to identify the problem in its beginnings and take the
proper steps to address them.
So what are these warning signs? Below are some of the more
common relationship mistakes that you should be aware of so
that when they do come up, you’re in a better position to do
something about it.
1. Cultivating false expectations.
Nobody is perfect, and yet, for some reason you may expect
some people in your life to be just that. So when they don’t
turn out to be the way you thought they should be, you
become disappointed and wonder what you ever saw in them.
Now, it’s very likely, that you never meant to set the bar
so high. But usually, this kind of expectation is set when
the person in question is someone you regard very highly,
and therefore idealize.
There is nothing wrong about thinking highly of someone, but
remember, that they, just like you, are only human capable
of making mistakes. So the earlier you incorporate this fact
into how you see people and their relationship to you, the
better you are at handling their shortcomings when they
arise.
2. Assuming they will never change.
As the old saying goes, “The only constant thing in this
world is change.” This applies to everything, including
people. The person you now know may be totally different
five years from now. This is because events and people in
his/her life will affect how he/she is as a person. Whether
you like it or not, the people in your life will go through
changes and you should be prepared for that.
3. Leaving out interests and friends for that person.
Some people assume that for a relationship to grow strong,
they need to focus all their attention and energy on that
one person. Usually, what happens is that they lose time for
other people in their lives, shutting them out.
This is about as bad a move as you can make for yourself.
You are doubly at loss because the relationships that you’ve
set aside feel abandoned while the one you’re focused on is
experiencing a lot of strain. It will only be a matter of
time when the person you’ve put so much time on will feel
smothered and wants to take time off from you. When that
happens, you’ll find that there is hardly anyone to catch
you because you’ve left all the others out.
4. Conflicts are bad.
The next time you run into an argument, avoid the assumption
that the relationship is immediately doomed. Remember that
the other person is someone different from you and
ultimately, will have a different set of opinions from
yours.
Given this, there will be disagreements, but that does not
mean that you cannot resolve it amiably. In fact, conflicts
can help the two of you develop a deeper relationship with
each other since you discover more things about that person.
And as you work around these conflicts a deeper bond is
formed.
5. Believing that you need a relationship to become a
complete person.
Develop the attitude that you can stand on your own two feet
and that you are complete regardless of whether you are in a
relationship with someone or not.
Do not allow a hole within yourself expecting someone else
to fill it for you. If you do, you go through life feeling
incomplete, leaving you jaded and unsatisfied. Be in control
of your needs and learn to be satisfied with who you are.
Relationships are meant to enrich something that is already
complete to begin with.
Being aware of these warning signs and taking the effort to
change will save you a whole lot of disappointment and
grief. You can only be a better person for it, which in
turn, improves your relationships with others. And that
leads to a fuller, more satisfying life for everyone
concerned.
About the Author:
How To Spark Romance is a new directory on how to spark
romance. From romantic date ideas to recipes you can use to
make an evening more exciting, we'll show you how to be
romantic.
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